This Rattan-Style outdoor cooler table includes all the items on your checklist.  Cocktail table?  Check! Drink cooler?  Check!  Sturdy Rattan construction?  Check!  You may have to sit on top of it to keep your friends’ hands off of the cold drinks!

This suspicious looking briefcase is not loaded with loot from a bank heist. Pop it open and let the vinyl records of your collection start the party. It will even plug into your PC’s USB port. Multiple styles and colors available.

This little stress relieving ball gets it all out for you. It’s a little nasty, but beats the effects of stress.

Bestway 60022E SaluSpa Hawaii 71-Inch x 26-Inch 6 Person Outdoor Inflatable Hot Tub Spa with Air Jets, Pump, 2 Filter Cartridges, and Tub Cover. It’s portable, convenient, and warm for these cold nights.

If you can bear owning a stuffed animal that is 6′ tall, this giant Teddy Bear might make a thoughtful gift  for your child or loved one. He’s big enough to hug, hide behind, or act as a sofa and even a bed.  He’s adorable enough to be a gift for your wife or daughter.  Imagine having to drive down the highway with this guy in the passenger seat!

Horror aficionados, never has drying your hands been so much fun! This blood-stained bath hand towel adds a touch of psychopathic class to any bathroom.

Polaroid has taken the printer out of the equation with their Snap camera. Instant tangible photos are at your fingertips except, unlike the ’70’s, they are digital.

This Mini Yotsuba Action Figure features moving joints and is available in a variety of colors. It would make a nice piece for your desk.