This Rattan-Style outdoor cooler table includes all the items on your checklist.  Cocktail table?  Check! Drink cooler?  Check!  Sturdy Rattan construction?  Check!  You may have to sit on top of it to keep your friends’ hands off of the cold drinks!

Made in Milwaukee, WI, like some of the best beer, this all leather bicycle beer carrier keeps your brew secure while riding to the party. Or just riding.

If you can bear owning a stuffed animal that is 6′ tall, this giant Teddy Bear might make a thoughtful gift  for your child or loved one. He’s big enough to hug, hide behind, or act as a sofa and even a bed.  He’s adorable enough to be a gift for your wife or daughter.  Imagine having to drive down the highway with this guy in the passenger seat!

This finger-shaped USB flash drive is likely the only time you can give someone the finger and get away with it. With 8 GB of storage and a very low price, this finger is one you will want to take with you. Freak out your friends when you place into your computer.

Happy Pigs Pewter Salt & Pepper Shakers are the cutest pigs you will ever see.  Don’t hog the salt and pepper or your guests may squeal for you to pass them around.

These novelty hoodies are printed in 3D for realistic representation and come in a variety of different images. Wear this particular one while walking down the sidewalk and you will be able to tell by the stares that this is realistic printing.

Go the F— to Sleep is a hilarious mock children’s tale that is definitely for adults only as it takes you on an expletive-filled journey through getting your little one to shut the hell up and pass out.  Get your little one to sleep, then read yourself to sleep with your very own bedtime book.

Are you going to be standing around with friends and enjoying your beer? No need to have to grab another when you can just wear a 6-pack around your waist.